[ Having explained it the way he did– not many are expecting that answer. He can see it on Eren's face, the confusion around why he was like this. There weren't too many more protests, though, and he can see the younger man was visibly relaxing. Not by much, but it was better than nothing. ]

I had them taken from me– no Contractor asks for their powers, they just receive them without warning. [ And then, they're bound to a Contract for the rest of their life. Whether that means they actually live as long as a normal person (to be decided, it's only been 10 years since the gates appeared) or if they end up getting killed due to their line of work. He has yet to meet a Contractor that's not involved in special operations or covert affairs in some manner. And even if they aren't involved, they quickly become involved because of persuasion from governments or syndicates.

That's the thing about being a Contractor, they'll always agree to whatever is the most logical. Maybe it's that which keeps them going. Their reason to live, because there's no rationale behind ending ones life for no reason. ]

If I'd done this on purpose, I'd be a very different person.

[ In either case, he'd be fighting for his right to live. Just now, it's fighting to be seen as an individual instead of a monster on some level. ]